2025 - Week 6

Caleb Trowbridge
Oct 16
3 min read

Cam Skattebo, pictured here in his natural state, is running the train on NFL defenses and continues to take more Tylenol than any human has ever done before him.

Alright first things first. I set my personal record for lowest points scored in a week. It was 50, now it's fucking 30. Thankfully, Bradley has the league low of 15 in one week, so that'll be tough to beat. Josh Jacobs and Jaylen Warren outscored my entire team, the team I drafted for like 230F. Josh Allen used to be on my team, if anyone can help find Josh Allen's football skills again, that would be much appreciated. Duped up and Lubed up wins this season's easiest matchup 93-30. DaVante Adams and Saquon Barkley combined for 8 points, but McMillan scores 14 and the Denver D chips in 13. Spencer moves to 3-3, 7th place, and matches up with the 4th place team, The Dogefather in Week 7.

Mr Slick and the Taco Tickler smokes Stolen Valor 105-70 to spoil Bradley's three game winning streak. Jonathan Taylor continues his dominance with 22 points, Ja'Marr and DK score 15 a piece, and Dak grabs three TDs in the Cowboys loss to the Panthers. Ragen has now won four of his last five games, averaging over 109 points per contest over that stretch. Bradley looks to bounce back against Repo Ric in Week 7, while Ragen is set to play me, which as of this point is fabulous for him.

Scotty Mo and Chicken Cock Whiskey sure gave us hope going into Monday night. Bijan quickly squashed all of that hope and ended the game with 32 points. Tank got 29 from Achane, 15 from Brian Thomas Jr, and 20 more from Caleb Williams. Scott's 28 point Skattebo start to the week and the 24 Drake London finish to the week was about all his team wanted to do. I'm sure its impossible to be more excited about a player than Scott must be about Skattebo. He's taking the league by storm, he's hilarious with his Gronk-esque good natured meat head routine, and most importantly, he's scoring a bunch of fantasy points. Lost In The Sauce remains perfect on the season after a 120-92 final score in this matchup. Can our defending champion take down this league's leader in Week 7? We're all pulling for you Dally!

The Dogefather gets 33 combined points from his kicker and defense, nobody on his team scored more than 19, but racks up enough points everywhere to beat Tripping Balls 110-93. Smith-Njigba does all he can with a 25 point outing, but the rest of Paul's team didn't give him much support. Everyone remember when Jake tried to say Jameson Williams was the Lions #1 WR at the draft?? Well he finally was! He only had 66 receiving yards amd 12 fantasy points, but he scored his second TD of the season finally! Suck it Jake, Lebron sucks. Paul is gonna have to try to right the ship against a hot Ripped running royals team in Week 7.

Speaking of, Nick is riding a three game winning streak, having won four of his last five, averaging 113 points per game over that span. His latest victim was Dallas in Week 6, smashing the defending champ 105-74. Nick gets extra GM brownie points by picking up Rico Dowdle and getting to witness him go the fuck off for two games, 31 last week with 32 this week.... Drake Maye helps with 26, and the Rams defense brought it home with 17. Dallas enjoyed 31 from Mahomes and pretty much no other thing his team did over the weekend. The defending champ is now on a four game skid, just in time to play the only undefeated team in our league. I believe in you Dally!

Repo Ric had the highest scoring team in Week 6, punishing The Damned 123-61. George Pickens scored 25, D'Andre Swift finally had a game with 25, Derrick Henry rose from the grave with 15, and Goedert may be the only Philly receiver worth a shit (scored 20 points this week). Mason trades CeeDee for Wilson and KWIII and gets four total points from the pair in Week 6. To make matters worse and his team name more appropriate, Wilson got injured and is expected to miss at least a couple weeks. The Damned is the most appropriate name change this league has ever seen.

Matchup of the Week is Stolen Valor vs Repo Ric, which 3-3 team can get above .500? Bradley and his fleet of Bills are on a bye, but Eric will be without his Raven players so things may get interesting here.

Happy Week 7 boys!

Commish Out.